Today I have lost a friend, a supporter, and a confidant.

Jack is known to me as a “street fighter” – he was a consistent and tireless advocate. He was one who believed in all people without any form of discrimination. He was true to his word and he never failed to follow through whether through thick and thin in order to keep his promises to the people. Jack has made a tremendous impact in my professional journey, beginning in the mid 1990’s when he would get on his bicycle and ride from Toronto to Scarborough in order to support me. He worked with me on a number of occasions to raise money to build a centre for women and children who are fleeing violence. Today that centre is known as Dr. Roz’s Healing Place. I can say with great confidence that without Jack’s support, determination and dedication, Dr. Roz’s Healing Place would not be existing in the same form as it is today.

Jack was one of the healthiest men I knew in the late 1990s and early 2000s. As a person who aims to live a healthy life each and every day, I recognize that Jack’s passing has given me different perspective on life. Keeping in mind that Jack has been a mentor and advocate, I encourage you to use your voice in order to bring about social change and justice into this sometimes unjust world, just as Jack Layton has done all his life.

At this time, I want to extend my condolences to Olivia – the existing force. I am sending you strength, beauty and goodness to continue the great work that you both have done. I want you to know that Jack will be forever be in my heart and in my thoughts.

On behalf of Dr. Roz’s Healing Place Staff, Board of Directors, volunteers and all stakeholders of Dr. Roz’s Healing Place, we take a moment to celebrate his work and his life in silence. We wish him a safe journey towards his next destination.

May he Rest In Peace.

Dr. Roz Roach
Executive Director
Dr. Roz’s Healing Place

‘Janicki’ shared with us that she had been raped over 200 times by her abusive husband, often more than once a night. He denied the family food and controlled every aspect of her life. She was not allowed to go out of her house or see family or friends and he saw to it that she never had any freedom. His abusive behaviour did not stop with her. Her three year old daughter was thrown across the room by her partner and her twelve year old son was taught to abuse his mother and sister and would often kick, punch and strike them with open hangers while they lived at the centre, much like his father would.

Her son was severely beaten by his father and her daughter would scream when she went to bed and have constant nightmares about being attacked by both her father and brother. Her partner also sexually abused her three year old daughter. Her son was apprehended by Children’s Aid for the safety of the family and underwent counselling and support to help him curb his negative behaviour.

She talked about how her family cut her off because she left her husband and blamed her for the abuse. When she came to DRHP, she had no supports and no idea what her rights were. While in the centre, the case went to court and the abuser was charged. As a defense in her partner’s case, his lawyer asked for mercy on his client because he had been beaten in prison. The judge felt compassion for Janicki and stated that her abusive partner showed no remorse and therefore would not be a good candidate for rehabilitation. Her abuser was sentenced to 6 years but was eligible for parole after two years. He was credited with one year for time served. He has recently been deported back to India.

Janicki now lives in subsidized housing and is trying to make a life for herself and her daughter on the outside. Her son visits with her and she is working towards reconnecting with him in a positive way. She is no longer living under the terror of her abuser and she has learned some skills that will help her to continue to be a self sufficient and empowered woman.

Janicki’s story is just one of many. Join us on our journey and help us realize a safe and secure future for Janicki and for all abused women and children.

“What Dr. Roz’s Healing Place means to me is a place where I can come back from school, to my friends, to my mentors who are very kind and helpful in any time of need. Once I come there it is like a home away from home. A place where I can be myself, with no one to judge me. The mentors are like family to me, that is ‘Ohana’ which means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. “
– Naol, Age 14

About three months before I went to Dr. Roz’s Healing Place, my husband went into a coma due to his diabetes and was hospitalized for over two weeks. When he was released from the hospital he needed help and I decided to take him to my home to assist him with his medical needs. Shortly after moving home he asked if he could come back into my life. He said that he would change for the better and I believed him. It didn’t take long for him to started verbally abusing me, putting me down and threatening me. He tried to limit my contact with my family and friends and threatened to kill me. He always made me feel bad about myself.

On January 10, 2009, I told him that I could no longer live with his abusive behaviour. He got upset with me and took a pair of scissors and cut my clothes and made all kinds of threats that he would do the same thing to me. I was so scared and didn’t know what to do. I eventually called a friend who helped me call the police and he was arrested but no charges were laid.

The question mainly during that time was, “What must I do to make my life better?” I thought of an answer, but only found it scarier than the reality. So I wasn’t only asking myself what I would have to do, but also what I would have had to endure if I stayed. But that day, I decided to break out of the cycle of being scared, to being free.

It was then that my sons and I came to Dr. Roz’s Healing Place. It was a safe environment with people that were there for us at all times. With their advice and support they helped us to be strong, healthy, and have hope everywhere we went. After Dr. Roz’s help we learned from our experiences to not be scared of anything, but always be strong for everything. To stand up for ourselves, which taught us to be happy and cherish every moment of our lives.

So now that leads us to the “present” and the amazing gift we were given, a life of happiness, safe surroundings, and freedom. Thanks to Dr. Roz’s Healing Place, we saw life with new perspective. Thank you so much for having such an impact on our future and making our dreams come true.

In 2006 my two children and I arrived in Canada. For the first two months our family was happy. After that my ex-husband started abusing me. I didn’t realize that it was abuse. I thought it was a crazy love.

He was controlling me, checking on me every minute, calling constantly. When I was going outside with our kids, he was spying on me and telling me that he saw that I was speaking to a male. My ex-husband prevented me from having friends, going to English as a second language classes. My ex-husband was controlling our finances (I never had money by myself) and he used me to his advantage.

For me there was no rest, no entertainment, no communication with others, no money, no English, no job, no me… It took 2.5 years for my emotions and power to fight for the right things, but one day something came to my mind and I saw my situation differently. I realized with the help of Victim Services, that it was abuse. Different kinds of it in one relationship: emotional, financial, spiritual and sexual. What I went through was a lot of brutality and emotionally I was dying inside. I was scared and thought it was the end of the world – it wasn’t. Now I know. It was the beginning of a new life! It was starting to realize and understand the truth.

With a help of supports in the community I am where I am today. From that wonderful castle, Dr. Roz’s Healing Place I got my power back. I’m strong and confident now! I think about those people as about an Army of Angels. That’s really true. Everybody, who works there is fighting for the truth, freedom, happiness. We didn’t have a place to live and our Angels gave us shelter and food. We had nothing to wear – our Angel the building manager, helped us and we were provided with clothes, toiletries, toys, books and everything that we needed. My Personal Angels, my counsellors helped me to resolve even my tiny problems or requests.

I got my apartment in an amazing location, in a park area, with a huge stadium across the road. I got my full time job. I work as a Private Care giver and part time I work as Concert Pianist, an Accompanist and as a Piano Teacher.

I have a lot of dreams and goals. I became so ambitious nowadays. I know, that a life without the abuse is like the life in HEAVEN!

I want to all of those amazing people, who supported and believed in me, who gave me strength, hope, faith and who helped me to find myself after a long-long journey of abuse. Thank you to everyone at Dr. Roz’s Healing Place. When I was going to that place by a taxi, being scared, not knowing English at all, being frustrated with one suitcase and two backpacks, I couldn’t imagine that from that horrible day that I would be going to a Wonderland called FREEDOM, NEW LIFE, JOY, POWER and BELIEF in myself! Thank you, you gave me back my life.

He pushed me out the door and told me to go out of the house. I begged him to not throw me out, it was at night and I was so scared and didn’t know where to go. Then I thought to myself that when he was done beating me and abusing me, he would call his sisters and the whole family so that they could come over and abuse me some more. This was always the practice.

I ran down the stairs crying and one neighbour saw me and told me that I have to call 911. I told her I didn’t have courage. She encouraged me to call because she knew it was not the first time and told me that he would kill me if I went back. She gave me 50 cents to call the police. I thought no more, if I want to stay alive, I have to go.

I will never ever forget that day, August 2nd, it was at night, around 1 or 2 am and two police officers brought me to Dr. Roz’s Healing Place. I was so afraid. I didn’t know what was going to happen to me. I cried non-stop and didn’t want the police to leave me there. I was worried that they would sell me or lock me inside of a room because that is what happens in my country. The police told me it was safe for me and that I would be okay there. The staff reassured me. I was offered food, shown to a room and given some clothes, blankets and a pillow, I was so grateful as I only had the clothes on my back. I slept and I felt easy. I realized it was very calm and good at the centre and woke up after many hours, feeling safe. Somehow I felt like I was in my mother’s lap. I couldn’t believe there were places like this for women. My English was very poor and I wasn’t able to communicate, I couldn’t understand easily so I would keep quiet. My counsellor would speak in Hindi with me. I would cry and cry and I felt comfortable to speak with her. She gave me sympathy and I will never forget what she did for me.

At Dr. Roz’s Healing Place, all the staff are so co-operative and very good and I have no words to explain the great qualities of everyone there. Dr. Roz is an angel for doing this type of work. This work is so important and life saving. After a little over a month at the Healing Place, I got my apartment and they gave a lot of things to me to help me set-up my new place. I just finished my high school equivalency courses, and I am now taking office administration. When I am done with school, I want to get a good job, I want to be of service and help other abused women who suffered like me. Especially in my culture there is so much violence, women are too scared to show other people what is really going on and what they are suffering through. I want to be their voice and teach them to find their own.

You may think I am doing something very extraordinary but truly, Dr. Roz’s Healing Place is my mother-home and my father-home. I am so grateful to everyone there for helping me find my voice.

I am from my dead father
Who wanted to make me a lawyer
I am from his prayers and hopes about his ‘son’

I am from my loving grandmom
And from hugs and kisses,
I am from prayer and recitations
And from a dark and lonely house
I am from a strict culture,
Legal, illegal, boundaries and punishment,
I am from the religious minded,
Sin, confession, sacrifice and loyalty

I am from ‘saying yes’
And smiling with a ‘hello, hi’
I am from serving best
Tea, coffee, Coke and punch

I am from ‘that’s it,’
From ‘don’t do it’ and ‘do it now,’
I am from shouts and yells
And from kicks and hits

I am from a free country,
Where I can raise my voice or say my thoughts
I am a LIBERAL and FREE woman,
And I can do WHATEVER I WANT!

It makes me sad when you scream at me
I try to figure out what makes you angry
The challenge I take up most of my life
Today I felt helpless, where are you?
I am being ignored and left to die
I have been talking in my mind –
My God, what has happened to me?
Now I have to rise on my feet for help
I may be ill, but I am NOT dead
There is no end to the path I must take
The blood may be draining from my body but
THERE IS STILL HOPE…
I still have the strength to call a friend
The challenge I take up to stand on my own legs and call for help
Makes me realize there is no end to the path I must take
My friend, YOU must take up the challenge and move on
You have a long life, keep safe and enjoy the fullness that was given to you
Do things that are spontaneous everyday and remember
There is no end to the path you must take…

• Know the facts about woman abuse
• Assure her that you believe her story
• Listen and let her talk about her feelings
• Do not judge or give advice
• Talk to her about her opinions
• Physical safety is the first priority. If you believe she is in danger, tell her. Help her plan an emergency exit.
• Respect her right to confidentiality
• Let her know you care and want to help
• Allow her to feel the way she does and support her decisions. Let her talk about the caring aspects of her relationship as well. Don’t try and diminish her feelings about her partner. Don’t criticize her for staying with her partner, but share information on how abuse increases over time without intervention.
• Discuss how violence affects children
• Be encouraged every time she reaches out for help as she is gaining the emotional strength needed to make effective decisions. She may be too fearful and immobilized or confused to take any step immediately.